Self help

Step inside the circle

A short video (under 3 minutes) that lends compassion
“What we have in prisons are the most traumatised people in our society” Gabor Mate

OCD Obsessive Compulsive Thoughts

Self help guides
Alcohol and you
Anxiety for people in prison
Controlling Anger
Depression and low mood
Depression and low mood for people in prison
Domestic violence
Eating disorders
Food for thought
Health anxiety
Hearing voices
Obsessions and compulsions
Post traumatic stress
Post traumatic stress for people in prison
Postnatal depression
Shyness and social anxiety
Sleeping problems

More self help guides here

Mental Health and Wellbeing


The Specialist Treatment Organisation for Perpetrators and Survivors of Sexual Offences has over 150 therapists across the UK who are trained to work with peopel who are struggling with sexually inappropriate thoughts or behaviours.  There is also therapy for family members of (potential or actual) offenders.  There is an online helpline for family members of sexual offenders.  StopSO offers training to therapists about how to work with sexually harmful behaviour.  There is an online support group for professionals who work in the field of sexual offending.  StopSO offers therapy for survivors of sexual abuse.   Juliet Grayson was a co-founder of StopSO and Chair from 2012-2019.

Safer Society Free Podcasts

Free Podcasts: Topics such as “Applying the Good Lives Model with Teenagers”, “Women Who Sexually Abuse”, “Vicarious Restorative Justice with Sexual Abusers”, “Promoting Social Skills in Adolescents”, “The #MeToo Movement”, “Family Therapy with Sex Offenders”, “Helping Families of Children and Teens with Sexual Behaviour Problems”, “Healthy Sexuality and Teens with Intellectual Disabilities”, “Applying the Risk Need Responsivity Principles in Practice”, “Motivation, The Good Lives Model, and Trauma Informed-Care”, “Adolescent Treatment Guidelines”, “ROSAC Risk Assessment”, and “Trauma Informed Care”.

Safer Society Press Podcast


Troubled Desire

TROUBLED DESIRE offers Online-Self-Management for people who feel attracted to children and early adolescents and don’t have the chance to get in real contact with therapists.

Seeking help for illegal online sexual behaviour?

Help and information and support for people wanting to change their illegal online sexual behaviour involving children, including those who view sexual images of children, and those who communicate sexually with children. We also support their families and friends, helping people cope with difficult emotions, and the professionals who work with these groups.

StopItNow! USA Advice Column

A comprehensive guide to low self esteem including resources

Get Help: CBT (this is not specifically about sexual offending).

But is Cognitive Behaviour Therapy

Sex Addiction: The Partner’s Perspective Paperback –by Paula Hall

Sex Addiction: The Partner’s Perspective is a book that is divided into three parts. Part I explores the myths surrounding sex addiction and provides up to date information about what sex addiction is and what causes it before moving on to explain why the discovery hurts partners so much. Part II is about partners’ needs and includes self-help exercises and strategies to help partners regain stability, rebuild self-esteem and consider their future. The controversial topic of co-dependency is also explored with guidance on how to identify it, avoid it and overcome it. Part III focuses on the couple relationship starting with the difficult decision of whether to stay or leave. Whatever the decision, partners will then find help and support for rebuilding trust and reclaiming their sexuality.
This book has been written to help partners not only survive, but to grow stronger and move on with their lives – whether alone, or in their relationship. Readers will find revealing statistics and real life stories shared by partners who kindly took part in the first UK survey of sex addiction partners. This book will this book be a valuable guide for partners, but also for the therapists who seek to support them on their journey of recovery.
Available at all the usual bookshops, and online.

The Lifecake Guide To Internet Safety & Privacy For Kids (And Parents):

  • A good overview of internet safety and privacy, with plenty of timely information, tips, and advice that parents can use to begin teaching their kids about staying safe online.
  • Practical advice about privacy and security settings when using popular apps like Snapchat, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and WhatsApp to ensure safe usage for children.
  • Safety guidelines for online gaming and how parents can teach children to be aware of, and understand, the possible dangers of voice messaging or chat functions with strangers when playing online.
  • Detailed information on cyberbullying – what it is, the key signs and what to do if something doesn’t feel right, and many other useful advice and resources to help parents keep children safe when accessing the internet.

The Law That Grandad Broke: Married to an internet sex offender –  Kindle book or paperback.

A kindle book @ £2.99 or paperback version available.
The story of how the author survived the shock and trauma when her husband of 42 years was arrested and imprisoned for downloading indecent images of children. Includes how the legal systems work, whether to tell people, visiting a prisoner, life in prison, returning to the community.

Modifying a  SOPO?

Applying to Modify My SOPO Term

Parents Protect:
Helping Parents and Carers to protect children for sexual abuse and exploitation

Treating Pedophilia

The Psychology In Seattle Podcast (podcast)
Click here to listen

You may call me Emma. I am a woman, approximately 30 years old, and I am a pedophile. Yes, really.

Click here to read article

For those dealing with issues around pornography

For Virtuous Paedophiles: Virped

Our website is intended to reduce the stigma attached to pedophilia by letting people know that a substantial number of pedophiles DO NOT molest children, and to provide peer support and information about available resources to help virtuous pedophiles remain law-abiding, and lead happy, productive lives.


For Minor Attracted People.   B4U-ACT was established in 2003 as a 501(c)(3) organization with the following purposes:
-To publicly promote services and resources for self-identified individuals (adults and adolescents) who are sexually attracted to children and seek such assistance
-To educate mental health providers regarding the approaches helpful for such individuals
-To develop a pool of providers who agree to serve these individuals and abide by B4U-ACT’s Principles and Perspectives of Practice
-To educate the public regarding issues faced by these individuals

MoodGYM:  this is no longer a free of charge service

MoodGYM is an interactive program designed to help you:
– Identify whether you are having problems with emotions like anxiety and depression,
– Learn skills that can help you cope with these emotions.

MoodGYM is based on two programs which are successful in preventing and treating depression and anxiety. These are: Cognitive Behaviour Therapy and Interpersonal Therapy.

It is an Australian government site but open to the whole world. You have to register. It came highly reccommended from some one who had struggled with sexually inappropriate behaviour.

Self deception, self delusion and denial

Here is a really useful and interesting series of articles by James Lawley and Penny Tompkins.

Interesting stuff! Have a read. Let me know if you use it and it helps you

Self Nudging

And one on self nudging…rather than setting goals how can one work to tip the odds in favour of my self achieving something..and incorporate the feedback if it doesn’t work, to increase the likelihood of it working next time.

Lovely work on Self Compassion by Kristin Neff

Website on self compassion with lots of resources: Kristin Neff

An article on the neurobiology of self compassion By Kristin Neff

Finding Children Sexually Attractive: By Sarah Goode

This booklet is for anyone who finds that they are sexually attracted to children. In it, people talk in their own words about their own experiences and provide advice on how to handle this situation.  I hope you will find this booklet encouraging, helpful and inspiring! Click here to download the booklet “Finding Children Sexually Attractive” Sarah Goode

The Ultimate Guide for Protecting Your Child on the Internet


Respond: Works with people with learning difficulties 

They have a unit that works with young people with learning difficulties or autism, who have sexually harmful behaviours

They also work with adults who have learning difficulties or autism, who display sexually harmful behaviour

StopSO: The Specialist Treatment Organisation for the Prevention of Sexual Offending:

A UK wide charitable organisation designed to help sex offenders stop their offending behaviours: by preventing sexual offending through therapy.